Getting diagnosed with HIV can be a harrowing experience. Not only must you deal with the health consequences of your diagnosis, but having HIV can make it difficult to date. Once you break the news about your diagnosis, your potential partner may react warmly or coldly. If he or she reacts warmly, all is well. You can continue the courtship process and potentially find a partner for life.
Grindr was a safe space for gay men. Its HIV status leak betrayed us
Grindr was a safe space for gay men. Its HIV status leak betrayed us | Grindr | The Guardian
To a certain type of gay man, the thought of dating someone who is openly HIV positive can feel like social suicide. They certainly aren't the best version of our culture, but any homosexual can attest to the reality of some sects of our society who view people's HIV status like designer labels. When it comes to a negative man choosing to date someone who is positive, they may run the risk of someone confusing their Prada suit in a Banana Republic bag. But Joshua Stearns knew that rumors didn't transmit the virus and that the potential for a loving relationship with Andrew was worth a few whispers over a mismatched label. Joshua and Andrew began their relationship in over casual coffee, a shared workout, and the occasional frozen yogurt.
Sharing that data undoes all its good work. G ay men have always needed safe spaces, somewhere they could congregate without fear of stigma and judgment or, even more essentially, persecution and violence. After all, people are already trading pictures of less visible parts of their anatomy; disclosing HIV status requires less fuss and perspective than a good shot of the meat and potatoes. Much like its precursors Manhunt and Gaydar, Grindr has a field in each profile where users can let people know if they are HIV-positive or negative.
There are a variety of reasons why I've stopped talking to a potential suitor before. To me, these are all valid excuses. The guy told me his status after two relatively successful dates. He didn't have to do that, but as our conversation gradually shifted in the direction of sex, it was bound to come up. I wasn't sure how to react.