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I was less than halfway through a night of gay speed dating for "bottoms" and "tops" and had already been asked three times if I was in the right group. There were, as usual, too many bottoms! If I wanted to sail with the boys on this gay Noah's ark, I had to maybe fib to myself a little. The event, which was held in the confines of a cavernous bar downtown, had a surprisingly large turnout. I happened to be one of the first guys to register with the organizer, and I took the opportunity to grab a beer and watch the men herd into line to register like cattle to the slaughter. There was a drizzle of uneasy laughter from the men in line.
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I first visited a gay sauna 25 years ago and have done so about once every six weeks since. Only adults are admitted; all that happens is by mutual consent; no one is exploited; common courtesy and consideration for others are the unwritten rules that are generally observed. Though I have always enjoyed nudity, I used to think of my body as unattractive. For years I disliked my given name. I have made a point of telling it to those I have met in the sauna; hearing it repeated with tenderness and passion has taught me to love it. When clothes are off, intentions clear and vulnerability shared, men talk honestly to men they may know only then and may never meet again. I have had deep conversations with people whose experience of life has been quite unlike my own, and we have played together for the mutual affirmation, delight and healing that only such intimacy can bring.
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Nick Jonas has spent the better part of the last month promoting his new single, " Jealous ," and his upcoming DirecTV series, Kingdom , with a dizzying media tour that has included not only interviews with several gay publications but stops at several gay bars. At HuffPost Gay Voices we've written about how Jonas happily showed off his abs at these bars, engaged in some light flirting with the patrons and has generally spent the last few weeks going out of his way to prove that his affinity for his gay fans is more than a mere marketing ploy or if it is marketing ploy, it's one to which he and his team are fiercely dedicated. Then, just when we thought Jonas had given all he had to give to us, we were gifted with his photo shoot in Flaunt magazine , which included several shots inspired by Marky Mark's iconic Calvin Klein underwear campaign.
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As the author of the first body language book for gay men, I'm often asked how male body language affects guy-on-guy dating. The answer: plenty. But to understand why certain postures, gestures and expressions make you more appealing to gay guys, you have to understand the 5 major principles of gay body language:. The truth leaks out of our bodies like a pockmarked water pail.
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